Sunday, February 12, 2012

thirty-eight

At fifteen, I loved a boy named John. I listened to Cat Stevens. I wore this Guatemalan woven hoodie with weird knitted, leather-soled slippers (I think we called them Afghani Freedom Fighters). Oh my goodness. 


At eighteen, I loved Andrew. I listened to the Chieftains and the Grateful Dead. I think I had a pair of red jeans...can that be right?? I think I had red suede boots to match. I was getting ready to graduate high school. 


At twenty-one, I loved a boy named Scott. I listened to Neil Young and Toots and the Maytals. I wore a brown Indian cotton sundress with Birkenstocks. I was preparing to go to Northern Ireland. 


At twenty-seven, I met a boy named Robin. We fast-danced to Sublime and Dave Matthews and slow-danced to Nina Simone. I can't remember what I wore because when I think of that time, I just remember music, dancing, and being so in love. Then the plans began in earnest: a house purchase, a wedding, a baby, then another, then another. 


Now I'm thirty-eight. 


I woke up on my birthday to the padding of little feet, the smiles and joy of my children wishing me a happy birthday. They proudly gave me their hand-painted cards, each revealing the beautiful developmental stages they are in. I unwrapped three pairs of earrings and three beaded necklaces, all made by little hands. What bountiful gifts!


My husband brought in the CD player, and a hand-painted card containing a mixed CD. I lay back with a mug of Earl Grey tea, and just listened with joy to the music he chose just for me, and wondered at where my life has brought me so far. 
At thirty-eight, I love a man named Robin. I also love our three children. I listen to Joel Plaskett, Amelia Curran, Lynn Miles, Feist, Blitzen Trapper, Bon Iver, and all those musicians I loved at fifteen, eighteen, twenty-one, and so on. I love my handknit socks and my yoga pants. As for plans, I can say that at thirty-eight, I feel the possibilities opening up before me as much as I did at fifteen.


For now, I'll just take more of the same, please.

20 comments:

  1. Happy birthday! You have written a beautiful post about yourself - I love this.
    Have a great day.

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  2. Happy, happy birthday! I love this reflective post. Past, present, and future. And you're so right, the possibilities are endless. So much wonder and new music to come.

    Big birthday hugs...

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  3. Lovely! Life is full of possibilities at all ages!

    I adore the outdoor photo with the balloons and rooster :)

    Red jeans sound right to me....I wore them when I was in Grade 7 and I am 32 turning 33 this year. I feel the need to admit I also had purple ones!

    Wishing you a super-sensational, great-celebrational happy, happy 38th birthday!

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  4. Have a fabulous birthday! What a wonderful, reflective post. Isn't it amazing how our past shapes our future just so?

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  5. Happy Birthday Stephanie. Aren't simple plans always the best?
    The past-present-future reference is very thought provoking for those of us approaching our own birthdays!

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  6. Happiest of birthday's! A very beautiful post.

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  7. Happy Birthday friend! You are beautiful!

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  8. Is it really that long ago that you wore those leather soled slippers?
    you will always be 15 to me.those same beautiful qualities that you had then are still around only hidden some days with your busy life.Many blessings to you this coming year.
    love mommy

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  9. Happy birthday! What a beautiful post. I like the cupcake cake :)

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  10. Happy Birthday! I hope your year is filled with many celebrations. It's good to feel grateful for our families, isn't it? Especially those faces. Yikes.

    Hope it's a great week. Thinking of you today as Alyce will bring home her first report card!

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  11. many blessings Stephanie! love to you and your family xoxo

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  12. Many happy returns of the day! May your years keep getting better and better!

    Jennifer @ Dark Blue Dragon

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  13. So beautifully written! Happy Birthday!!!

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  14. A very happy, happy (belated) birthday to you!!
    -Jaime

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